


The Historian & The Knight

by crybb8



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Drama, F/M, Multi, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-03-16
Packaged: 2018-05-23 21:32:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6130747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crybb8/pseuds/crybb8
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren steals Hux's lady love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Liliana

She stared at Hux, unsure of what to say given her current position in front of the general. Seated and handcuffed in an interrogation room was not exactly her dream destination.    
Hux regarded the silver headed historian before him, she was in her night clothes and eyes swollen with sleep.

 

“I have relics to catalogue in the morning, why am I here?”   
“I wanted to talk.”   
“So having me manhandled by three stormtroopers at three in the morning and shoved into an interrogation room is the appropriate way to tell me you wanted to talk?” Her usually soft demeanor was gone and her tolerance for Hux had long since vanished.   
“Well you wouldn’t talk to me if I had asked now would you?”

 

She glared back at him, “Will you uncuff me?”   
“Are you going to throw anything at me this time?”   
“It depends,” she snapped.

“On what,” he scoffed.   
“Are you going to be an asshole or not.”

 

He uncuffed her and settled down across from her.   
“Liliana, I’m sorry I truly am.”   
She crossed her arms and eyed him icily, “Go on.”   
“I was wrong and I shouldn’t have lied to you.”   
“And,” she pressed.   
“And… well that’s it. I shouldn’t have lied about the other girl, I should have told you when it happened.”   
“You should have told me that it was the assistant doctor of the medical wing, I eat lunch with that woman from time to time Hux. Also, this is so typical of you. You act like you’ve changed and then you do something to show me otherwise. And then! And then you won’t take no for answer. You won’t leave me alone when it’s very clear I want nothing to do with you. Is this why you woke me up?” She crossed her arms over her chest and looked away.

  
He was realizing now that he should have just let her simmer for another week before trying to talk to her.

“I love you,” she snapped and he looked a little taken aback. “But you, as such a ruthless general have no time for love or the petty emotions of us silly little people.”   
“You’re being ridiculous.”   
“I am not being ridiculous, however, I am going back to bed. If this happens again I will throw you out of an air lock your pretentious hack,” she spit as she got up headed towards the door.   
  


The door slid open and a presumably surprised stormtrooper stared back at her.   
“Take me back to my room, right now!”   
“I’ll take you,” Hux spoke up, she glared at him and pushed past the stormtrooper.

 

The walk back to Liliana’s quarters was painfully quiet and the four hundred hall seemed to stretch on forever. She walked slightly ahead of Hux stony and tight lipped. Hux watched her sadly as she stopped at door 482, she ignored him as she punched in her door code. The only noise between them was her door sliding open.   
  


“I love you too Lili,” he stated quietly.

“Don’t,” she held her finger up, “Don’t you fucking dare.”   
Her door slid shut and Hux was left alone for a moment until the door slid back open. He had she had changed her mind but her icy glare stated that it hadn’t.

“I will be by tomorrow to pick up my things, I don’t care if you’re there.”   
  


This is was it. This was the end, through all of their ups and downs Lana had never asked for her things back. They still sat neatly in their corner in Hux’s bedroom.   
“Please reconsider.”   
“I do not tolerate cheating. I do not tolerate lying. I am done,” she stated through gritted teeth.   
Hux went to open his mouth, to protest, to confess his sins, anything. He just wanted her to stay.

 

“Done!” Her door slid shut one final time.

 

Liliana had sucked down three cups of coffee that morning in preparation for her, hopefully, final meeting with Hux in close quarters. She felt terrible and jittery, the jitters she refused to blame on the coffee. She sighed and checked her appearance one last time in the mirror before walking out the door. High ranking officers and the like lived one level up from the four hundred hall in the 1000s. Liliana detested the random jump in numbers and had prefered if they just been the 500s. 

 

She was thankfully ignored by the few late officers she ran into as she maneuvered through the first half of the hall. She scanned for door 1068 and was met with Captain Phasma’s silver armor. The two women exchanged brief pleasantries before Liliana cut to the chase, “So are you here to make sure I don’t break anything?”

“Pretty much, though you’ve never struck me as a breaker.”   
“I’m a thrower,” Lili gave a wry smile.

 

Liliana was let into the lavish apartment by the captain and found all her things neatly tucked into a box, she looked over her things unsatisfied.   
“Something is missing, a book,” she looked to Phasma for permission to search for it.   
“Go for it.”

Liliana shot straight into the bedroom and scanned Hux’s shelves for the one precious thing. It was a book of very old folk tales that her mother had given her when she was child. She had given it to Hux in hopes of stirring some sort emotional response out of him. Apparently it had worked because the book was well hidden or all together just not there.

 

“Where is it,” she popped back into the livingroom where Phasma was seated.   
“Where is what?”   
“The book, the anthology of folktales from my home planet.”   
“I have no idea.”   
“Well where is Hux?”   
“In a strategy meeting with Ren.”   
“Where,” Liliana was on the verge of hysterics.

“It would not be a good idea to interrupt that meeting. Kylo Ren has been particularly irate lately and I’m sure you yelling at Hux would only exasperate it,” Phasma was edging closer to the historian.

Liliana was out the door and down the hall before Phasma could stop her. She was walking, almost running, trying to dodge stormtroopers incase Phasma had put out a warning of her approach. She avoided the elevator and took the stairs up to the main deck of the base trying to get out some of the adrenaline in her system. Chest heaving, she willed herself to calm down, and to catch her breath. She rounded the corner and head on into Kylo Ren’s back.

She tried not to burst into tears she really did, especially when she realized that she had interrupted an argument between Ren and Hux. 

“Dr. Brama,” Ren acknowledged her.

“You are interrupting an important conversation Doctor,” Hux snapped at her. The tears began to roll down her cheeks but she kept her composure.   
“Well you have something very important of mine and I would like it back,” Lili matched his tone. Ren just stood there as ominously as he could, realizing he was not supposed to be privy to this interaction. He stayed only to spite Hux.   
  


“I don’t have that stupid book,” Hux spat at her and she slapped him as hard she could.

  
She was gone and Kylo Ren could not contain his laughter.   
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so moved before.”   
Hux glared at Ren and followed in Liliana’s direction.


	2. Sad Girl & Curious Boy

Liliana had decided that cataloguing old relics could wait another day as she returned to get her things from Hux’s quarters. She tucked the box under her arm and left his apartment quickly, hoping not to run into him. She returned to her own apartment with a bottle of red wine waiting for her by the door, a token of some sorts from Phasma. It was far too early in the day to start drinking, sorrow or not. 

 

Liliana’s droid trilled a hello at her as she walked in.   
“Hello XC-E3,” she sniffled. The droid was mortified at her formality and whirred its way towards her. “I’m sorry E3, it’s been a difficult morning.” The droid made a knowing little chirp as if to say, “Ah.” Liliana set her box of things down and walked to the bedroom to get out of her “professional” clothing and into something comfortable. All of her sleep shirts at this point were Hux’s and she stared at the contents of her pajama drawer with disdain. 

 

_ Someone’s coming! _ E3 chirped from the living room.

Liliana went to the door and opened it before her visitor could knock. A gangly boy with ash blonde hair and vivid blue eyes stood before, her assistant, Lad.   
“What Lad,” the boy stared back at Liliana who was presently pantless.   
“I-I uh, you didn’t come to the study this morning and I was worried.” You would think the child had never seen a woman’s bare leg before.   
“I am taking a personal day, plus all the other times I’ve needed you you were never there.”   
“Well, ma’am-   
“Lili, call me Lili. Not ma’am, not doctor, not Miss, just Lili. We’ve been over this a dozen times.” 

 

Lad was an exceptional cadet and had quickly moved up through the ranks at school granting him a spot under General Hux’s wing. Of course he had been underfoot far too much and Hux had stuck Lad with Liliana. Needless to say Lad had accrued a very obvious crush on the historian. “Lili, you have relics to catalogue and new fabric slides from the University,” the boy proclaimed. Liliana looked at Lad with slight annoyance, “Now is not the time to take a sudden interest in my duties.” The boy blushed a little. “I’ll be back Thursday morning bright and early, you should too,” she informed him. He looked crestfallen as the door slid to a close in his face.

 

_ He’s gross, _ E3 chirped.   
Liliana shot the little droid a look, “He’d be cute if he was older. Twenty is just too young at this point. Thirty four is too young too apparently.”   
_ Oh he was much too old for you Lili, _ E3 twittered. She gave the droid another look and it pretended to go to sleep.

 

\---

 

Kylo Ren had always been intrigued by the historian with the ever changing hair color and penchant for General Hux. She had come off as too sweet to work for the First Order, but she was able to amass a large collection of priceless relics and books. So she stayed. He had never ventured to the “study” as it had been dubbed, but heard the floors were covered in antique rugs and stuffed with baroque styled furniture. 

 

He would bide his time until Hux’s feelings for the girl had subsided a bit before making an appearance. Hux was incredibly territorial when it came to Liliana. Women never held Hux’s attention for long, but Liliana had held him for over a year. From what Ren could tell, she had no problem saying no to Hux and Hux liked it. Hux had even thought of proposing to Liliana, which had marked the downfall of their relationship.

 

Ren remembered that day, Hux was unusually late for a meeting with Snoke and the knight. His thoughts had been projecting louder than usual, thoughts of Lili and love. She had gifted him with a book from her childhood, one of folktales. Ren had thought it a silly token of love and tried to ignore Hux’s psychobabble. Snoke had verbally torn Hux apart for having kept him waiting but the general didn’t care. Hux was gone as soon as the meeting ended and Ren had thought it was to return to Liliana.

 

Hux must have scared himself good, because he went straight to the medical wing to see a particular woman. Dr. Cerria Pellis was a brilliantly smart woman and a former fling of Hux’s. She also had befriended Liliana in an attempt to pick at Hux. The general had not gone to her seeking sexual release, but that's what happened. As if on autopilot he dove in head first into the woman’s web. She was smugly satisfied with what had transpired, but Hux was mortified.   
“We tell no one,” he had stated while dressing himself. She had simply agreed while straightening herself and getting back to work.

 

The day after this event had happened Hux had been a wreck, his uniform disheveled and hair a mess. Kylo Ren took notes. He didn’t even have to peek into Hux’s mind to know what had happened. Waves of dread had rolled off of the general. It had given Ren an obnoxious amount of anxiety that day. He had wanted to choke the general in hopes that it would provide him with some relief, but had refrained.

 

It had been about three months since the disastrous affair had happened and it was peculiar to Ren that Liliana was now just finding out about it. Hux had never shied from being brutally honest with the girl before. It had caused many fights between the two before, but Hux had kept mum about the affair. 

  
He remembered vividly what it felt like to have the emotional girl bump into him. Her emotions had coursed through him for a few moments when they had met in the hall. He had seen a bright intensity of colors with the mix of words in her head. She seemed to feel in flashes of color. He had seen deep reds that had given way to rich purples then deeper sorrowful blues. It was such a curious thing to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for the kudos, it means so much that somebody likes this stuff I come up with.


	3. Trinkets and Things

Thursday rolled around and Liliana was unprepared to put it simply. E3 chirped at her to wake up. “I know,” she groaned from under her pillow. E3 clunked against her bed frame, _Get up!_ the droid beeped. “I’m up,” she declared sitting upright and flicking her bedside light on. _Gooooood_ E3 chirped as it rolled out of reach.

 

“Coffee first, then I’ll get dressed, then I’ll look over Lad’s notes, and off to the study,” Liliana made her mental checklist as she walked to the kitchen. Her living room had been filled with bouquets of rare tiger lilies. She didn’t even bother to read the note left on her kitchen counter. She made a mental note to change the passcode on her door. “Fucker,” she muttered under her breath as she slammed her coffee cup down. She noticed Hux’s coffee cup in it’s usual place and knocked it into the trash bin. “Fuck him.” She went back to making coffee.

 

E3 was whirling around the flowers making excited beeping noises as it entertained itself.

“At least you’re happy,” Lili called to the droid. She pushed a vase out of her way and set her coffee down, deciding to kill two birds with one stone she looked over Lad’s notes while she sipped her coffee. Lad had taken it upon himself to catalogue the relics some high ranking official had dug up will sneaking around Jakku. Liliana was surprised, he had done everything the way she would have. He had gently cleaned everything, determined what material they made from, then photographed, and logged them in accordingly.

 

Lili fanned through a few more pages before figuring Lad hadn’t messed up too badly in her absence and set the packet of paper down. She grabbed another cup of coffee and headed to her closet because pajamas were not appropriate attire for the unofficial historian of the First Order.

 

“Black, black, off black, brown black,” she fanned through her clothes. “Blue black,” she held the top up to her chest and looked at E3 for an opinion. The droid just stared back at her.  
“You’re never any help when it comes to clothes,” she mused as she reached for a sleeveless turtleneck. “We’ll do high waisted riding pants and this turtleneck,” she looked to E3 again for approval. The droid’s response was a little electronic snoring noise. “Ok, well the next time you decide to go off on a tangent about your complex circuitry I’ll make sure to snore through it too,” Lili teased E3. _Rude!_ It tweeted back.

 

“Do you want to come to the study with me today?  
_Will that boy be there?_   
“Lad? Probably, he’s been incredibly attentive lately.”   
_Yeah cause he wants to do you._

“Unnecessary!”  
_It’s trueeeeeee, you know it’s true. He stares at you with big puppy dog eyes._

“I can’t even comprehend that right now E3.”  
_No, I don’t want to go to the study with you today_ .   
“Suit yourself,” Lili shrugged at the droid and started gathering her things.

 

Liliana was met with a very excited looking Lad as she reached the doors of the study.  
“So I saved the best for last,” he exclaimed gleefully guiding Lili past her desk and into the cleaning room. Lad pulled up a stool for Lili and placed three fabric sleeves in front of her, “Okay so put your gloves on.” She complied pulling on a pair of second skin gloves. They allowed the wearer to work without transferring the oils of their skin to whatever they were working on, but did not compromise the sense of touch.

 

Lad delicately pulled out the first mystery item, it was a section of intricate silver chain, where each piece of chain met sat a tiny diamond. Lili peered at the piece of jewelry, “What’s next?” Lad pulled out the second item from it’s fabric sleeve, this item was mostly intact.  
“Oh it’s beautiful,” Liliana gasped reaching out to pick up the silver head band. It would’ve gone around most of the head and inlaid into the silver band were seven tear drop shaped gems. Liliana looked closely at the stones, “Is that benitoite?” Lad nodded. “Oh how wonderful, those are so rare. This must have belonged to someone very important.”   
“Just wait,” Lad grinned as he revealed the last mystery item. It was a section of red fabric with intricately embroidered gold floss on it. Liliana oohed over it.

 

“So,” Lad clasped his hands together, “Do you know who these belonged to? Can you tell?”  
“I have no idea,” Liliana murmured her eyes running over each piece.   
“Padmé Amidala,” he beamed.   
“No,” Lili looked at Lad in disbelief. “I just can’t believe that anything of hers would be left, are you absolutely sure?”   
“Well see this was part of a headpiece of hers,” Lad indicated, “And this, this speaks for itself. It’s a crown of sorts. Then the last piece was part of her throne-room robe.”   


“I should show these to Kylo Ren.”  
Lad’s face fell. “What, why?”   
“Padme was married to Darth Vader… before he was Darth Vader,” Liliana stated in a “you should know that” tone. The boy pouted for whatever reason and Lili just rolled her eyes and swiveled on the stool. “This is so amazing though,” she peered back at the pieces of Padmé’s.

She pecked the boy on the cheek and was out of the cleaning room and back into the main area of the study.

 

“What a great start to the day,” she beamed at Lad, “Thank you.”

They both quickly settled into their usual routine, Liliana citing books for Lad to pull off the surrounding shelves and sending the boy out on coffee runs.

“Why don’t you just get a coffee pot,” Lad huffed as he sat down her fourth cup of the day down in front of her.  
“I don’t want the study to smell like hot coffee grounds,” she replied not looking up from the research grant she was writing.

“It would save me some trouble,” the boy pouted.


	4. Liar Liar

Liliana had let Lad go early for the day, telling him to celebrate his little discovery. She hummed to herself as she put a few books back in their rightful places. She made a mental note to find a few books on Naboo and it’s ceremonial costuming. She dragged a finger across the wood of one of the book shelves and made another note that Lad should probably spend the weekend dusting.

 

Somewhere behind her someone cleared their throat, politely trying to get Lili’s attention.   
She turned to see a very tall, dark headed man, of indisputably high rank behind her.   
“Hello,” she greeted stepping down from the shelf she had climbed. She looked him over having the sense that they had met before but she couldn’t place him.

“Can I help you with something?”   
“I was looking for a book.”   
“Well you’re in the right place.” 

He gave her a small awkward smile in response. She felt a little wave of butterflies in her stomach.  _ Don’t be ridiculous  _ she thought to herself.   
“Well what are you looking for?”   
“I heard you had a section related to Sith magic and talismans.”   
“I do! The books are very old and rare so you will have to look at them in a special room, with gloves. You’re welcome to take notes, just don’t remove them from the room.” She led the man to the little room tucked away next to the cleaning room.

 

“It’ll be a bit chilly in here, so you can bring a jacket. Over here is a box of second skin gloves, please wear these at all times when you’re handling the books.” She peered around trying to find anything else to inform him about.

“Ah! Over here in the first section is about culture and their caste system. The second row is mainly about the great war, and this last little section over here is what you want.”

 

“This is what you love,” the man stated.   
“Well yes, I love books and history. I could go on forever about them,” she smiled shyly catching herself. Liliana always felt the need to tone it back for those higher up in the Order. Everyone seemed so reserved and no one ever smiled outside of their own quarters.

“Also, The Study is usually open Monday through Friday from 9am to 3:30pm. Unless I’ve found something of interest to research then it will be open later. As long as I am here or my assistant Lad, then you’re always welcome.” she shrugged. The room felt very small of the sudden. 

 

He stared intently at her as she him.   
“Please don’t call me doctor, or anything formal. Lili or Liliana works just fine.”   
She shuffled a little bit, feeling awkward and too aware of herself.   
“I’m Ben,” he stuck his hand out and she shook it.   
“Nice to meet you.”

 

She smiled nervously at him, “Well, I was getting ready to close up. But you’re welcome to come back tomorrow.” She stated as she led him out of the little room.   
“That would be nice Lili,” he shook her hand again and was out of the study in a swish of black fabric. 

 

Liliana rolled her eyes and sighed at herself. “Get it together woman,” she murmured. Ben was cute and tall and very very well dressed. She wanted to smack herself at how awkward she had been. She pushed the thoughts away and quickly went back to reshelving books.

 

\----

 

Hux had been debating all day whether or not to go see Liliana. He knew she didn’t want to see him, but he so desperately wanted to apologize. He so desperately wanted her to take him back. He felt ridiculous and irrational. Before he could stop himself he was out of his quarters and down the hall walking towards Liliana’s study.

 

He would’ve run if he knew that he would not run into stormtroopers or Phasma. He would never hear the end of it if she had caught him running to Liliana. He began reciting what he would say to Lili. Trying to find the right words that would hopefully move the historian into reconsidering him.

 

His thoughts were cut short when he passed an unmasked Kylo Ren in officer’s clothing and no cape. He stopped when Ren gave him a smirk.   
“What were you doing,” He hissed at Ren.   
“Nothing,” Ren stated innocently and Hux bristled. “She’s quite cute especially when she talks about things she loves.” Ren mentioned off handedly. “It’s a shame you picked sleeping with the doctor over her.”

 

Hux tensed and glared at Ren, almost astounded at the low blow.   
“I deserve that,” Hux snipped, “From her, but not from you.”   
“Hasn’t she asked you to leave her alone? I doubt she would be happy to see you.”   
“Stay away from her.”   
Ren gave him a predatory cat like smile, “No.”

 

“She wouldn’t appreciate your childishness Ren, nor put up with it.”   
“I’m not concerned with that.”

Hux eyed Ren with detest, “There is no competition between you and I.”   
“I guess Lili will be the judge of that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that its taken me so long to update. I went out of town and then I got sick so its been hard to get to a computer to write. Thank you for the kudos everyone it's greatly appreciated! Also I'm super loopy off cough syrup so I'll probably have to go back and edit some things. Again bear with me y'all.


	5. Little Light

Lad eyed Liliana, ‘Why do you have more makeup on than usual?”   
She swiveled in her chair, “What are you talking about.”   
“You never wear eyeshadow, you’re doing that contouring thing that you don’t need to do, you have a different shade of li-

“I can’t wear makeup?”   
Lad gave her a sour look, “You know that that is not what I’m saying.”   
Lili gave a nervous laugh, “I know, and I’m sorry. But if I explained you wouldn’t understand.”   
“Oh. my. god. Don’t give me that “only women would understand” bullshit. Men do just as much preening.”   
“Oh I doubt that,” she waved her hand dismissively.

“Do you notice when I get my haircut,” Lad pressed.   
“Yes, every three weeks.”   
  


Lad looked taken aback, and Lili rolled her eyes.   
“Well you don’t say anything,” the boy pouted.   
“You get the same standard hair cut as everyone else in your ranking class,” Lili laughed.

“I notice when you dye your hair,” he countered.   
“Well it’s usually a pretty drastic change. I switch from pink to brown, then to black, then to green, and now I’ve got this silver grey going on. It’s pretty hard to miss.”

He was stumped, “Fine you win.”

 

“Would you go get me some coffee please,” she held the cup out to Lad.   
“Your heart is going to stop one day, this is like your fourth cup this morning.”   
She pushed her hair in her face, “I need coffee to create. As the tragic artiste this library would be nothing without me,” Lili stated dramatically, Lad rolled his eyes.    
“One cream, no sugar?”   
“Thank you,” she blew the boy a kiss and swiveled back in her chair to the pile of research grant drafts she was editing. 

 

“You know since you work for the First Order you don’t really have to write research grants.”   
Lili looked up and had to stifle her smile when she saw Ben standing before her.   
“I assume that’s what you’re looking at.”   
“Well I need something to keep me busy, plus I consider it more polite than using the Order’s muscle to get what I want. People respect that more in academia.”

He shrugged, “Well I’m sure if you asked you wouldn’t be refused.”   
“Oh come on, I doubt Kylo Ren cares about what I’m doing. He probably thinks I’m a hoarder.”   
“It’s not hoarding if everything is expertly organized and labeled. You own some of the most valuable antiques in the galaxy.” He teased.   
“Go read,” she shooed him away playfully.

 

He gave her a small smile and disappeared into the air conditioned book room. Lad had immaculate timing because he caught her making eyes in the direction of the small book room. “Oh,” he stated setting her coffee down.

“Thank you,” she reached for the coffee and Lad scooted it just out of reach.   
“Who’s in there.”   
“His name is Ben.”   
“Oh you’re on first name basis with him,” Lad gave her a devilish look.   
“He came in yesterday after you left and was asking about books on Sith magic.”   
“Well he must be a really high ranking then if he’s asking about that. Like up there with Kylo Ren and Hux.” She cringed at the mention of Hux’s name.   
“Sorry,” Lad gave her a sheepish look and handed her her coffee.   
“It’s fine,” she waved him away and sipped from her mug.

 

She shuffled through more papers with a red pen in hand. Occasionally marking here and there were words needed to be changed or marking out whole paragraphs. Lad was doing a whole bunch of sighing as 1:30 approached on the clock on the wall.

“You can leave if you want, but I would appreciate it if you dusted this weekend.”   
Lad groaned, “You know I hate dusting. Plus you just want me out of here so you can make eyes at Ben.”

“You were the one making all that noise over there.”

“I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Have a good weekend.”

 

Liliana chewed on her lip staring at the door Ben had gone into earlier, wondering if she should interrupt him or not. She pushed the thought out of her head, “You’re being nutty,” she told herself. She went back to her research grants with little interest, but quickly looked up when she heard the door to the book room slide open. 

 

“I think I’m done for the day,” Ben stated tucking a folder under his arm.   
“It’s only two, are you sure?”   
“I think I’ve read everything I can about talismans and the dark side.”   
“Oh I have so many more books and slides on the dark side, there's plenty more to read about the Force,” Lili laughed.

 

“It’s kind of cute to see someone get excited over talking about the Dark Side,”

Lili blushed, “I mean, from an academic standpoint there’s just so much.”

“I’ll see you on Monday,” he gave her a small smile and was out the door.

 

\----

 

Kylo Ren felt a little bad lying to the girl, technically his name was Ben, so technically it wasn’t lying. He hardly gotten much note taking done when he had gone to the study. All he wanted to do was talk with her but was certain that her assistant would recognize him and give him away.

 

He stared off into space wondering if this is what having a crush on someone felt like. He felt foolish and exhilarated. The way she lit up when she talked about books or anything related to her academics was adorable. Knights of Ren did not use the word adorable. This is why he felt foolish. Some silver haired girl was stirring up feelings within him.

  
Sure he had flings here and there but they had all been sexual in nature, at least on his end. He never felt the need to emotionally connect with others, he found it wasn’t necessary. Liliana felt like a light. Whatever room she was in seemed brighter and he was drawn to it. Initially he had be interested in her to spite Hux, but he didn’t feel like that now. Ren hoped that if he played his cards right in a few weeks he’d ask Lili to dinner and go from there.


	6. Ben is Revealed

Kylo Ren had been finding excuses to visit Liliana in the study for over three weeks now. Eventually he had stopped using his research as a reason to see her and just began showing up around the time he was sure she would send Lad off for the day. She was always waiting for him with some new bit of reading or a relic that had been sent to her for cleaning and recording. Today was no different, but she looked more excited than usual.

 

He handed her a cup of coffee and then sat down across from her.

“So!” She beamed at him, “A few weeks ago Lad found some really interesting pieces that belonged to Padmé Amidala. Well we’ve found more things and I’ve been compiling a catalogue all day. This is really exciting.” She handed the datapad to Ben that contained pictures of various pieces of fabric and jewelry.

 

He looked stunned as he scanned through the photos.   
“These are beautiful,” he mumbled.   
“Aren’t they? I’ve gotten a hold of someone who was able to salvage a few of her gowns and I’m currently working on a deal to buy them.”

Ben looked at her thoughtfully, “Are you going to tell Kylo Ren?”   
“I want to but I don’t know how to get a hold of him. Plus I’m sure I’d be too terrified to talk to him.”

Ben gave her a small knowing smile, “I think you’d be surprised.”

 

“Oh yes, me the mousy little historian coming to the scary Knight of Ren with scraps of fabric and jewelry of Darth Vader’s wife.”   
“Kylo Ren is Darth Vader’s grandson.”   
Ben watched Lili’s eyes grow wide, “Really, I knew they were related but I didn’t realize it was that close. Wow.” She looked back down at the datapad a little more amazed.

“I think you should speak to him, he would be thrilled to know you’ve found some of Padme’s things.”

“Are you sure Ben,” she asked nervously chewing on her lip as she often did when her nerves hit her.   
“I’m sure.”

 

\----

 

Liliana had gathered enough courage to ask for an audience with Kylo Ren and he accepted. She had bullied Lad into going as well since he had originally found the first three pieces.   
“I don’t see why I have to be there,” he whined as Lili straightened his shirt.   
“Did you get dressed in the dark this morning?” Lili kept picking at Lad’s clothing, finding imaginary hairs and wrinkles to nag over. Lad rolled his eyes and let her fuss over him, it seemed to make her feel better.

 

She pushed his hair out of his face and straightened his hair back into place.   
“Ok, so you have the dresses, and I have the jewelry and pieces of fabric.” she counted off one last time. He rolled his eyes again.   
“Don’t roll your eyes in front of Kylo Ren!”   
“I won’t.”

Lili sighed and straightened herself, “I’m ready are you?”   
“Yeah I think I’m ready to be force choked to my death today.”

She shot him a fiery look, “I’ll probably kill you before he can.”   
  


The walk to the meeting room Kylo Ren had instructed them to meet him at was quiet and awkward. Lad was just trudging along as Liliana went through various scenarios in her head.   
Lili had reached full freak out mode in a matter of a few minutes.   
“What if he’s upset some of the fabrics aren’t whole dresses?”   
Lad gave her a look, “Calm down, I think even Kylo Ren can understand that something like that is out of your control.”

She shook her head, “Ok, fine.”   
“I have never seen you freak out like this before.”

“I’ve never had a reason to freak out like this before.”

 

The meeting room was empty when they came to it which allowed Lili enough time to lay everything out and fuss over it until she thought it was perfect. Lad slumped down into a chair.   
“Sit up straight,” Lili hissed at him. She settled beside him and waited quietly.

 

The door to the meeting room slid open and Kylo Ren came in followed by a disgruntled looking Hux. 

 

“Great,” Lili thought to herself.

 

Lad saluted the both of them a waited to be told to be seated. Hux, dismissed him.   
“Why is he here?”   
“He discovered the first three pieces, I figured he should be here.”   
“Very well,” Hux dismissed Lili. She didn’t react out of professionalism.

 

Lili set a datapad in front of Ren, “So those are a few of the pieces that I have catalogued. The rest are here.” She indicated to the dresses gently placed on the table.

Ren scrolled through some of the photographs.   
“Dr. Brama, these are wonderful finds,” Ren’s distorted voice praised through his mask.   
“Thank you sir.”

“I think this proves that you are an amazing asset to the First Order and myself.”

Hux shifted and Lili could tell he wanted to make a snide remark.

 

Kylo Ren got up and gingerly brushed his gloved fingers over one of the gowns.

“Where would she have worn this one,” he questioned, looking at a partial dress made of white lace. Liliana had spent hours meticulously cleaning it.

“I assume, sir, that this was her wedding dress.”

 

Kylo Ren paused then looked back at her, “Thank you for finding these.”   
“Of course sir.”

  
There was a swoosh of air as Kylo Ren opened his helmet and took it off.

Hux rolled his eyes at this dramatic display and Lad just looked confused.

“You don’t have to call me sir, Liliana.”

“Ben?”

“But I would prefer Kylo Ren over Ben.” Liliana was shocked, “I don’t know what to say.”   
“I’m not so scary after all,” he gave her a warm smile. This display of warmth was unusual for Hux to see but her kept his mouth shut.

 

“I do appreciate this very much, from the both of you.” Ren looked to Lad and Lili.   
“How do you plan on keeping the dresses?”   
“Well, the full dresses I was planning on putting on display somewhere. Obviously in a temperature and humidity controlled room. Uhm I haven’t really thought through everything else. I have several things to fully process at the moment.”

“I understand.”

“Thank you.”

“We’ll speak later and figure out a plan for your dresses Lili,” Ren dismissed her and was quickly out of the room. 

 

Hux lingered, “We need to talk.”   
“About?” Lili was having none of his shit.   
“Can I leave,” Lad looked to Lili instead of his commanding officer. Lili waved him off as she glared at Hux.

 

“You know he’s only doing this to spite me.”   
“What are you talking about?”   
“I know about him spending time with you.”   
“I knew him as Ben, I had no idea who he really was. I just thought he was some high ranking officer.” She was packing things up as Hux carried on.   
“Do you even care about what I have to say?”

“I lost the ability to care for what you have to say to me when you decided to cheat and lie to me. Is that clear? I know you miss me and I miss you too. But you’ve been a real shit head. I’m done,” she snapped as she headed towards the door. “And you know what else, not everything is about you. Not everything is always done to spite you. You are such a self centered child I can’t believe I loved such a ridiculous man.” With that she was gone and Hux was left alone with her words still hanging in the air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think!


	7. I'll Try

It had been about two weeks since Kylo Ren had revealed himself as Ben to Liliana. Incredibly confused and a little annoyed she refused calls from both Ren and Hux.

 

“You can't ignore Ren forever, you can try with Hux,” Lad piped up while doing the dusting he had been putting off.

 

“You missed a spot,” Lili didn't look up from the book she was annotating. She could hear Lad roll his eyes.

 

“Eventually, Ren will just show up and demand that you speak to him.”

“Well he really has no place to do that. He's Ben and then he's not Ben, he's a Knight of Ren. And then Hux said that Ren was only speaking to me just to spite him. I don't want to be involved in their psychodrama.”

“Well really it's just macho male bullshit.”

“And I don't want to be in the middle of it. Either Hux needs to grow up or Ren needs to find a better approach.”

“Well you liked him just fine when he was the mysterious high ranking officer. God you were insufferable, you had this dreamy look on your face all the time and you were sneaking sugar into your coffee. You were second guessing yourself and triple editing your papers. You never do that,” Lad huffed.

 

Lili just stared at the boy who was perched on one of the higher shelves next to her desk ignoring her look.

 

“Plus you didn't act all doe eyed with Hux. And then Kylo Ren swoops in and you're all weak kneed and in distress.”

“I am not that bad,” Lili protested.

“You could date someone nice but these men with authority issues just appeal to you for some reason.”

“They are the authority.”

“Yes and they have issues with each other.”

 

She gave Lad an irritated look and tried to get back to her book.

 

Lad continued, “And I'm sure you're oblivious to the other officers that pay you attention.”

He must have been talking about himself. 

“Like who,” she snapped the book shut and looked back to the boy.

“Me, for one. Then there's that officer below Phasma and that doctor in radiology. But-

“Lad, you're free of your duties for the next two weeks.”

“Oh did I cross a line,” he looked down at her from his spot.

“Yes, get out.”

 

In one fluid motion the boy was down the ladder and out the door with his things. Lili’s cheeks were flushed with anger. She was getting fed up with the men on this starship. She went to the closet to fetch a box and began placing objects on Lad’s desk into the box. 

 

“These man children… Lying… Petty… Bitter.” Each word came out with each object she chunked into the box. 

“No one knows how to fucking dust!” Lili shook her fist at no one in particular. She sneezed as a plume of dust flew from the displaced objects on Lad’s desk.

“No more assistants, no more men on this ship!” Lili continued talking to herself as she tidied the area around her desk and Lad’s. 

 

Ren cleared his throat and Lili spun around ready to hurl a snappy response to the intruder. She quickly shut her mouth and stared at the black clad man.

“Lili,” he greeted.

“Well?”

He was unaffected by her attitude.

“Can we talk?”

Lili looked at him defensively, “Do I have a choice?”

He thought about it and gave her a playful smile, “probably not.”

 

She sat down at her desk and looked at him with disdain.

“Oh please don't look at me that way.”

“Go, please, explain yourself to me!” She waved her hand at him to get a move on.

“I shouldn't have presented myself as Ben, I should have been honest with who I was. I created a false trust with you and I can understand why you would be wary of me now. But, I was afraid that if I had come to you as Kylo Ren you would have been far too worried about being proper around me. I enjoyed being a normal man for a few weeks. I could be myself without concern of the Order or any of my other duties.”

Liliana eyed him with uncertainty.

 

“You know I am aware of the myriad of issues you and Hux seem to have with each other. I don't want to be used as some ploy to irritate him. I did enjoy my time with Ben, but you being Kylo Ren makes things seem incredibly complicated.”

“I understand.”

“That's so easy for you to say!”

“Can I confide something in you?”

“That's very cliche.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh dark tortured leader confides in bookish girl. This is right out of a young adult novel.”

“I think you've over thought this a bit.”

“I have!”

 

He laughed at her in earnest.

“Before I was Kylo Ren, I was Ben. But Ben has been gone for a very long time now. Again, as I said it was nice to speak to you on level ground. I wasn't Kylo Ren to you.”

 

“You were Ben.”

 

“Right, but I would like to start over as Kylo Ren.”

 

She stared at him eyebrows raised and lips pursed. “Well you know your temper is galaxy renowned. That's worrisome. Anyone you're close to could be a considerable weakness. I could be picked off by one of your enemies’ just for being close to you. I don't know, you also kill people. That's a little hard to swallow.” She counted off on her fingers.

 

“First of all, I would never allow any harm to come to you. Secondly Hux has killed people too, so I think by now you should be a little familiar with the whole concept.” He looked at her pointedly.

 

“Fine,” she sighed in exasperation.

“Have I displayed any anger around you?”

She shook her head.

“Have you heard about any of my outbursts since I've been visiting you.”

“Well no, but I also haven’t been speaking to Hux. He was the main reporter of your outbursts,” Lili shrugged. “Also,” she added, “Your whole reveal was so anticlimactic, there was drama, but… I don’t know.”   
  


Ren looked amused, “Is that what you’re choosing to complain about?”

 

“Yes!” She sat up straighter. “You’re this great dark leader shouldn’t your grand reveal be… grand?”

“You’ve read too many romance novels.”   
“I do not.”   
“You and Phasma trade them for wine.”   
Lili gave Ren a dirty look. 

 

Their back and forth fell into a lull and Lili contemplated the man before her. He was all wild dark hair and piercing eyes. She had always imagined a more animated man constantly moving with his moods and thoughts. He was incredibly still and poised. He watched as she looked him over.

 

“Am I to your liking?”   
“Oh shut up,” she blushed a little.

 

She was very quiet now as she kept running her eyes over him, searching for something out of place.

“Will you be honest with me?”   
“Of course.”   
“Will you be nice?”   
“I’ll try.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I on a roll? Probably.


	8. Hux Kind of Saves the Day

Liliana drummed her fingers on her desk, she had completed all of her research grants, sent them out, and catalogued what was left in the backlog of relics and old junk. Simply put she was bored. She had permanently relieved Lad of his duties as her assistant and was now left with a very lonely study. She had tried countless times to coax E3 into coming with her in the mornings, but the little droid prefered the confines of the apartment.

 

Kylo Ren had been courting her, as he called it, for almost six months. She found the whole thing a little old fashioned but appreciated his company so she didn’t complain. However even the thought of him could not stave off her boredom. He had been gone for almost three weeks now on some training mission of Snoke’s. He was set to be home any day now, but Liliana was listless.

 

“I guess I’ll fucking dust,” she sighed throwing her hands up in the air.

 

She pushed the rolling ladder down to the door and started at the shelf which contained military defense strategy and the like. It was her least favorite subject to read about yet this shelf was almost filled to the top and spanned two cases and half of another. She climbed up and began wiping off the layer of dust that had settled.

 

Liliana was seven bookcases in and it was always the seventh shelf where the track the ladder was on caught. She wiggled herself and the ladder trying to get the ladder to move over the divot in the track, no luck. She moved further up towards the top and tried to pull herself and the ladder over, a little give. She shifted, this time stretching out further from the ladder. Her hand slipped from the metal track and she lost her footing on the ladder.

 

She figured a ten foot drop would take longer, but she hit the floor with a resounding thud in a blink of an eye.

 

“Fuck,” Liliana gasped.

 

White searing pain shot up her right side as she shifted onto her back. She tried to calm herself and breathe back the air that had been knocked out of her. She gently ran her hand over her side to see if she could feel the rib that was probably broken.

 

_ Oh fuck this is not good _ .

 

She had left her datapad in her apartment and there was no panic button to push. She waited for some magical rush of adrenaline to give her superhuman strength or shock to settle in. She gingerly rolled onto her left side and tried to get to her feet. The broken rib screamed with the movement and hot tears of frustration rolled down her cheeks. She laid still trying to figure out what to do.

 

She reminded herself that she didn’t have much time before the muscles around her rib would begin to swell. She gritted her teeth and willed herself up, letting out a pained cry. She wobbled towards the door and was met with a wave of nausea. Again she willed herself not to throw up, terrified that the pain would make her pass out.

 

She made it out into the hallway and quite a ways the hall down from the study when panic began to set in. She had seen no one, not a stormtrooper, random ship official, or even a droid.

 

“Fuck,” she gave herself the limited vocabulary. She paused leaning against the wall for support to take a few shallow breaths. Footsteps sounded from around the corner and she thanked whatever deity was looking out for her in that moment. 

 

Hux rounded the corner to find an ashen and hurt Liliana.

 

“Oh thank goodness,” she breathed. “I fell,” she managed weakly.

“We have to get you to the medbay,” he was clipped with her. “Can you walk?”   
“Not well, it hurts to move.” She put more of her weight against the wall trying to put some space between them.

“I’ll have to carry you then.” He wasn’t giving her a choice and carefully picked her up.

 

Liliana clung to Hux mostly out of habit and not knowing what else to do, she really just wanted to cry. But not wanting to give him any satisfaction in seeing her upset she tried to distract herself. She counted the doors they passed in an effort not to focus on her probably broken rib.

 

He got to the medbay in a third of the time it probably would have taken her.

 

A doctor was quickly summoned, Liliana was striped, put in a gown, and then into a bed. 

“We’ll have to xray to see what is  really going on in there,” The head doctor, Dr. Halcard stated to Hux as he hooked a morphine pump to Liliana’s IV.

“Is a morphine pump absolutely necessary?”   
“For the first three days yes, and then after that she’ll have an oral dosage every four to six hours or so.”

Hux looked skeptically at the doctor who just shrugged

 

A nurse hovered over Liliana, “On a scale of one to ten how’s your pain hon?”

Liliana gritted her teeth, “Nine.”   
“Hon, that’s pretty high,” the nurse drawled.   
“I fell ten feet,” Liliana let out a sob, “Please I just want some relief.”

Dr. Halcard placed the clicker for the morphine pump in her hand and she jammed the button down as quickly as she could.

 

“Now depending on her tolerance of opioid compounds she could either be coherent or this low dose could knock her out.” The nurse looked at Hux and then back to a heavy lidded Liliana.   
“How ya feelin’ hon?”

“Wonderful,” Lili gave the nurse a dopey smile.   
“Could we have a moment before you xray her?”   
Dr. Halcard nodded and then nudged the nurse along.

 

“Lili,” he took her hand and she gave him a sleepy smile.   
“Hi Hux.”   
There wasn’t much he could say to her in this moment, “I’m sorry for how I treated you.”   
“Oh, what? That was months ago,” her words jumbled together. “I forgave you a while ago.”   
He gave her a small smile as she tried to keep her eyes open.

“Where is Ren,” she murmured softly.

“He’s on his way back, he’s almost to the ship. Maybe another hour or so,” he stated softly as he petted her hand.

“Tell him I’m ok, please.”

“I will.”

 

The morphine had successfully knocked Liliana out and Hux notified the nurse that she could be taken to x ray.

“You her husband or somethin,” the woman inquired while eyeing Hux up suspiciously.   
“I could’ve been.”   
Again the woman eyed him with suspicion, “Well since you’re not her spouse I’ll have to ask you to wait outside of her room.”

“Very well,” Hux gave the woman an annoyed look as she wheeled Liliana out.


	9. Morphine is Great

Hux had alerted Kylo Ren’s cruiser that an emergency had arisen and that Ren should try his best to arrive promptly. Liliana had been out for almost two hours when Dr. Halcard brought her x rays by.

 

“She has outright broken a rib and fractured another two, she’s lucky her fall hadn’t been any higher or we would probably be dealing with a case of flail chest.”

Hux looked at the x ray blindly, unsure of what he was looking for.

“So here’s the break on the sixth rib,” Halcard indicated the break for Hux and he nodded. “Then the fractures on the other two, fourth and fifth.”

“How long will it take her to heal?”   
“Well she seems to be in good health and she’s young, so four to six weeks,” the doctor concluded.

 

The nurse had been hovering around Lili as Halcard spoke to Hux, checking her vitals and temperature. The nurse pulled back Liliana’s blankets and her gown before preparing a gel pack.

“What is that, what are you doing,” hux interrupted the nurse’s work. The old woman shot him an annoyed look.   
“It’s a CoolPak hon, it’ll help with the swelling.” The nurse went back to gingerly laying the clear blue sheet of gelatinous goo on Lili’s ribcage. Hux eyed her with suspicion.

“Mel, if you would give the general and I some more time you can come back and tend to your patient when we’re finished,” Halcard suggested. The woman covered Lili back up and went on her way shooting Hux a glare as she passed.

 

“So we’ll keep her here for three days and then release her into whoever’s care.”

Halcard looked at his datapad and then back at Hux, “She doesn’t have any next of kin or a spouse on the ship, and I don’t advise her looking after herself.”   
“Well her, uh, significant other is Kylo Ren.”   
“Oh,” the doctor said while realizing that if Ren didn’t like how Liliana was cared for he could be out of a job.

 

As if on queue Ren appeared, helmetless and ready to decapitate someone. He honed in on Hux and the doctor.   
“Where is Li-” he cut himself short seeing her fast asleep in the little bed. 

“What happened, did someone hurt her, is she sick?”   
“She fell and has fractured two ribs and broken another.”

“I could Force heal her,” Ren through that out there and Halcard looked less than pleased but kept his mouth shut.

“Lets leave the healing to Dr. Halcard, Ren,” Hux stated, eyeing the nurse who hovered close by waiting for her patient to be freed up.

 

Ren was at Lili’s bedside tucking her hair behind her ear, “Lili,” he murmured. She stirred a little then opened her eyes.

“Morphine is wonderful,” she shifted then quickly stopped as pain shot up her side. She frowned pulling back her blanket and gown. “What is this,” she prodded at the CoolPak stuck to her ribcage.

“Its supposed to help with the swelling,” Hux supplied.

“Mm ok,” she gave him a dopey smile and then looked back to Ren with the same expression.

“I missed you.”   
“I missed you too.”   
“Why do you look so freaked out, you two look like I died,” she laughed a little as Ren covered her back up. She pushed his hand away, “I’m ok!”

 

“Is she ok? I heard the emergency call and was concerned,” Lad walked up quickly to the two other men. Hux and Ren looked at Lad with a little judgment.

“Lad,” Liliana piped up. He came to her side, ignoring Ren.   
“Oh wow, you’re a 2nd lieutenant now!” She had assumed from his change in uniform, ever observant even in her morphine haze. His hard set jaw and gaze softened as he looked at her. “You’ve grown up so much in the last six months I can’t believe it,” she chattered on.

 

The nurse took this opportunity to butt in, “And who are you two?” She ushered Ren and Lad a safe distance away from Lili’s bed.

“I am her significant other, her boy friend if you will,” Ren snapped.

The nurse looked unimpressed. “Well you haven’t put a ring on her finger so I don’t care who you are.” Lili laughed at this.

“They’re ok, I promise,” Lili smiled her little opiate smile at the nurse.   
“You’ve had a rough day, you need your rest,” the nurse chastised as she fussed over Lili once more. Nothing was out of place but she found it odd that a bunch of men had showed up at the girl’s beside.

 

“Will someone please bring E3 to me!”

“I’m not leaving,” Ren stated. 

“Nor I.” Hux and Ren looked at Lad daring him to protest.

“Very well I’ll go get the droid,” Lad huffed as he left. The nurse looked a little pleased but was still unhappy with the large male presence.

 

Lad came back with a wildly beeping E3, the little droid was throwing every insult it could at Lad.

“E3 doesn’t like being carried,” Lili mumbled half awake.

Unsure of what to do with the droid Lad placed E3 at the foot of the bed.

 

_ Lili! Are you ok? Did they hurt you? _   
“Oh E3 I fell in the study, but I’ll be ok. I just hurt my ribs.”

She gave E3 a sleepy smile, “I’ll be ok, I promise.”   
The droid rolled in place, _ I was worried sick! That idiot came and picked me up and I had no idea what was going on! _ _   
_ “I’m ok,” Lili repeated.


	10. Happy

Ren had agreed to let Liliana recuperate in his living quarters. E3 had beeped up a storm and Ren was stuck with two guests for the price of one. For lack of a better term the droid was nosey and refused to stay in Ren’s bedroom with Lili. So far Lili had been a good patient and wasn’t fussy with Ren’s regimented painkiller and food schedule.

 

“It’s time for your breathing exercises,” he nudged her a little. She turned from the book she had been reading to look at him.

“Those hurt,” she pouted.

“They’re necessary. If you don’t try fully expanding your lungs a few times a day you could get a chest infection.   
“I will take the chest infection.”

“I’ll do it with the Force,” he threatened. She gave him a reproachful look and slowly shifted into a sitting position.

 

“You’ve got fifteen minutes before your next dosage, if you get through this I’ll give it to you early.”   
“Oh what a treat,” she stated dryly before taking a deep inhale and grimacing with the exhale.

She laid back down on her side, placing her hand softly on her ribs and breathing again.

“Four more times please,” Ren asked brushing her hair back. She focused on a place on the ceiling and continued the deep inhales and exhales.

 

Lili stuck her tongue out expectantly after she had finished, Ren delicately placed a pill on her tongue and she swallowed. He rolled his eyes and went to get up.   
“Please come cuddle.”

He gave her a stern look, “The last time you asked me to do that you were halfway successful in coercing me into having sex with you.”

“I coerced you into nothing!”

“We’re going to wait until you’re fully healed.”   
“I’m great,” Lili protested.   
“A false sense of well being is a side effect of the drugs you’re on.”

“At least kiss me,” she pressed.

 

He kissed her softly on the forehead.

“Ren! My mouth, kiss me on my mouth!” He laughed at her, but complied. She wrapped her arms around his neck to deepen the kiss and he didn’t protest. Enjoying their small moment of intimacy Ren pulled away, rubbing the tip of his nose against hers.

 

“You always look at me that way now, what are you thinking,” she murmured, eyelids getting heavy from the pill she just took.

“Those few weeks away from you were very hard for me and to come back home to you… I feel like a lucky man.” He kissed her again, softly. She smiled at him warmly in her hazy state.

That smile could disarm anyone, he had seen it happen many times and experienced it many times as well.

“At least lay with me until I fall asleep.”

He carefully placed himself around her, laying his chin on the top of her head and delicately placing his arm across her.

She sighed a little, “This is nice.”   
“It is,” he said as he nuzzled her hair.

 

In a few breaths Liliana was asleep, Ren stayed and watched the shallow rise and fall of her chest for a few moments. The last six months with Lili had made him more driven and clear headed. He rarely ever had an episode of explosive anger, Snoke even noted this. His mind seemed to be in the right place, he hadn’t felt torn between the two sides in his head. Lili had been the balance he had been searching for for so long.

 

\----

 

It had been almost a month since Liliana’s fall and the doctor was impressed with her recovery and lack of a chest infection.

“You did your breathing exercises, I was worried you wouldn’t,” Dr. Halcard stated as he peered over his chart.

“So, your xrays look good. You’re almost fully healed, I’d say if you continue with what you’re doing in the next week or two you should be all clear.”

“Oh wonderful,” Lili beamed at Halcard and then to Ren.

“I’ll see you in two weeks,” Halcard nodded and left.

 

“So I have two surprises for you, Lili,” Ren steered Lili out of the medbay and towards her study.

“You know I absolutely hate surprises.”

“I know, but I think you’ll like the one a lot.”   
“What about the second one?”   
“You’ll find out,” Ren smirked at the girl.

 

Reaching the doors of Lili’s study, Lili eyed Ren with suspicion.

“What did you do?”

“Just close your eyes, and no peeking!”

She obliged with a huff and listened closely as the doors slide open. Ren tugged her forward into the room.

“Ok open your eyes.”

 

She opened her eyes and looked at the study. Ren had had the bookshelves remodeled and there were several show cases displaying some of Lili’s prized artifacts.

“Oh… oh I don’t know what to say,” she gasped as she looked around.

“So now you can reach everything and I don’t have to worry about you falling down.”

She laughed softly, “Thank you.” She kissed his lips softly.

“Is everything in it’s rightful place?”

Lili peered from shelf to shelf, “Yes!”

She kissed him again.

“So what is my second surprise?”

“Be patient,” he laughed a little, “It’s not here, it's in your apartment.”   
She looked incredibly excited, “Did you remodel my apartment? Do I finally have a walk in closet.”

He shook his head and led her out again.

 

“So you didn’t remodel anything in my apartment?”   
“No I didn’t.”   
She huffed, “Well fine.”

“But now I know you really want a walk in closet and I assume a general overhaul of your living space.”

They walked into her apartment which was a quarter of the size of his.

 

He pulled her close tucking her hair behind her ears.

He sighed.   
“Are you about to ask me to marry you,” Lili whispered.

“What? No?”

“Oh,” she sighed with relief. “Ok good because I am not ready for that.”

“Lili, my Liliana. I realized while having you stay with me while you were healing was wonderful. Being able to sleep next to you every night and wake up to you every morning, I really enjoy it. So I was hoping you would move in with me.”

She looked at him wide eyed.

“That’s a huge commitment Ren. You would have to deal with me being in your space all the time. My books would be everywhere. We would have to have a floral comforter on the bed.”   
“I am perfectly fine with all of that, except the bed. The sheets stay black.”

“Black, with floral embossing,” Lili countered.

“Is that a yes?”

 

She wrapped her arms around his neck and planted the biggest kiss she could on his mouth.

“Yes!”

“That makes me truly happy to hear,” he stated as he kissed her again.

**Author's Note:**

> Bear with me y'all.


End file.
